Friday, November 22, 2013

Attitude toward food during Holidays?

I typically throw caution to the wind during the holidays when it comes to food. Hey, those Christmas cookies don't come out again for another 12 months. And who makes pumpkin pie in July?

I guess right now I have the mentality that I am not really 'on a diet' right now, and that I can eat whatever I want. But at the same time, I'm not going crazy with it. There's a balance between enjoying the holidays and not depriving yourself of all the good food and drinks, and making sure I don't gain 10lbs doing it.

I still have this inner battle about eating good (and only good, i.e., driving myself crazy) and being healthy, eating in moderation and making sure I think of it as a lifestyle change rather than a diet. It's hard to fully change your mentality about this.
I've gained back a few pounds from the diet I was on last month, and I do kinda beat myself up about that. So much of the holidays is centered around food and drinks though, and maybe if I can just maintain for a few more weeks, then I'll get down to business. Not sure if that is logical or an excuses...
Does it ever get easier? Do emotional eaters ever rid themselves of that inner noise about food?

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Won the bet

Not that I really have anyone following this blog anymore (sad...), but I forgot to post the results for the Diet Bet I was doing (bad blogger... sad, again).

But, yes, I did "win" the diet bet.

I had actually hit the goal after 3 weeks, but then had some social stuff, like a party and going camping with friends, that pushed the scale back up. Who doesn't want to get tipsy while camping? The only thing to do out in the woods is eat and drink.. and I guess some other stuff. But the highlight for me is the food and alcohol. That said, I screwed myself a little bit when we got back and the scale was up.

So I took a couple days to be CraZy good, and the day before the weigh in, I had me some salads and then spaghetti squash for dinner, and voilà, hit the goal the next day. Success.

All in all, I really liked the Diet Bet because it pushed me to do it when I normally probably wouldn't have. Money is a great motivator. I had $55 in it and got $85 back. If I had lost, I woulda lost the $55. But it does give you some serious anxiety too. My recommendation is to do it in a month where you have control over what you're going to eat most of the time, which I know some of you may argue that we always have control. But let's not put heavy pressure on ourselves to lose weight when we know we have holiday parties and love all the holiday drinks and desserts and good meals coming up. Ya know?

Monday, October 21, 2013

Less than 24 hours baby

I have to weigh in for the Diet Bet in less than 24 hours. This morning I was at 168.4 before I worked out, and 167.8 after I worked out. I am typically always less after a workout... so I don't know which number to believe. Thoughts?

Either way, I have about 1/2 lb to lose (or more, depending) by tomorrow to not lose my $55. Actually, I think they give you 24 hours to record your final WI, so maybe Wednesday morning.

This weekend was super fun. We went camping with some friends and hiked and ate and drank and laughed and talked. I brought healthy food like rice cakes and dehydrated veggies, but I did drink me some wine. I drank my fair share, let's say. This is why I didn't lose anything this weekend. Luckily though, I didn't gain.

Today's plan is healthy, HEALTHY eating and drinking lots of water. And will work out in the morning. And that scale had better be 167.4 or less. Anything else I can do?

This Diet Bet is awesome. With all my expenses for the wedding/honeymoon/Christmas/life... I really do not want to lose $55, so that is such a great motivator. It is also a little anxiety producing. I think I will do it again, but maybe in January when all the holiday goodness and socializing isn't going to get in the way. Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to stop losing weight, I'm still truckin!

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Ugh! One week left

This dietbet thing has got me really focused on the goal. Don't want to lose that money.

But ughhh I'm so over it. This thing breeds anxiety, but it is working because I haven't given up yet. I weigh myself every morning (168.2 today), but I usually do that anyway. Maybe my problem is boredom. I have a banana and yogurt for breakfast every day. I don't snack. I eat salads or something veggie-like for lunch, and then a leaned down dinner, and don't overeat.

I am so glad to push myself out of the 170's because that hasn't happened in about 2 years. But I'm kinda stuck at this 168 number. And I have to be 167.4 to win my diet bet money back - by next Tuesday.

Next Tuesday, is stuffed crust pizza day, and I'm making some dessert. Walmart has a crazy dessert shelf with all these seasonal cake mixes and no-bake goodness. It's happening. Can't wait.

With that said, I am thinking about doing another diet bet just to make me keep that anxiety motivation up.

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Date Night and Still Stayed on Plan

So many times I have felt like if I am going out to dinner, going to a party or having people over, especially if drinks are involved, that I just need to make that a cheat day. Because how could I possibly eat healthy in situations like that? Well, I can. I just have to want to.

Last night, the fiancé and I went out to dinner. We had fried pickles as appetizers and I ordered salmon without the glaze and stuff it came with, drank a diet soda, and then we went out for frozen yogurt. I LOVE frozen yogurt. Of course, ice cream is great, but there is just something about a guilt free bowl of fro yo (with peanut butter cups on top) that makes it so much better.

This morning I woke up and worked out, and the scale went down even. It's good to know I can still go out, have fun, eat good and stay on my plan and lose weight. I'm past the point of being bitter I can't eat the junk, and am just motivated by seeing the scale go down. I feel strong and confident that I can do it.

Friday, October 11, 2013

Actually back in healthy habit mode

I'm sure I've said this before, but making a habit out of exercising and eating healthy is what makes you last in the long run. Right now, I can happily say that the scale has been going down and I feel like I am in habit mode.

When it's not a habit, it seems unnatural, depriving and generally just a pain in the ass. I will whine all day about how much it sucks that my fiancé can eat snacks all night and not gain weight, but if I glance over at his milkshake, I gain a pound. For looking.

But! After a few weeks of just pushing myself to eat better, it starts to be a habit, and I just go with it. After it's a habit, it gets so much easier.

Eating healthy and saying no to the fatty snack foods has also shown me what I actually like and don't like. Those little vanilla snack cake things? Eh, I could really care less. A donut? Or better yet, one of those new cronuts? Um, yes. Yes, I do want. This makes it easier to splurge on the thing I really want and say no to all the other things I just feel "eh" about.

So cheers to being in habit mode. May I stay in it til I reach my goal. (We all know the good habits can be very, easy come, easy go...)

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Just what I needed

This crazy little diet bet I signed up for was really what I need to get my butt in gear.

For some reason, the whole, "yeah, I need to lose weight..." thing isn't always a real thing. It isn't critical that I lose weight this week or this month. It can happen or not happen, and there are no huge consequences. (Other than being uncomfortable with staying at the same weight and being unhappy with the way I look, of course.)

Sometimes, there needs to be that extra push. And I guess when I put $55 on the line, especially when I have wedding and honeymoon stuff to pay for, it was just the push I needed to actually do it. Plus, I told friends and family that I signed up for it. And I got a  kind of weird mixed reaction. This is probably due to the fact that lately when I say I am going to lose weight, I never really do. I'm around 170, so losing 5 pounds is not going to make any difference. What's the point in saying I am going to lose weight if I am just going to lose 5-8lbs and stop and gain it back? I bet people are tired of hearing me say it. Or just not very confident that I will. Because track record says I won't these days.

When did I give up on my 100lb weight loss goal? When did losing 75lbs and just stopping become ok? I'm 3/4th of the way there. Why not finish? Why not make that little tracker at the top of this blog look all nice and pretty with the icon all the way to the 100lb mark?

I need to hit 167.4 by Oct 22 to not lose my $55, and this morning the scale was at 168.7. It's rare for me to see the 160's but I like it! No more 170s!

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

I bet $55 that I'll lose 4% in a month

Oh lord. I've done it! I bet $55 on that I will lose 4% of my weight in a month! I am in 2 of these games, one for $30 and one for $25.

I weighed in at 174.4 today. This is the official starting weight. To lose 4%, I need to lose 7lbs.

Sooo basically I am doing this and WILL lose 7lbs this month. Because I am NOT losing $55, but I AM losing 7lbs! And the plan is to win back even more than what I put in.

I think this is just the thing I need to put some fire under my ass and make me do it. I have been under this pattern of losing about 8lbs and then going back to the stress eating. Right now I need to push through the 170's and get the ball rolling again.

Wish me luck or feel free to join in on the bet for yourself!

Monday, September 9, 2013

Diet breaks?

How many of you guys take diet breaks? I cannot stop taking breaks from my diet. Well, really it's just me cheating on it. It's that whole Ross and Rachel "we were on a break!" thing. I like to say that I am taking a break, but really I'm just cheating on my diet with a whole bunch of junk food.

I'm not dedicated enough. I was the epitome of motivated when I was 250 lbs and needed to get back to a realm of normal. But now I'm 170's and can't break through. Or I shouldn't say "can't" rather than I just haven't yet. But I am getting married in less than 8 months, so now is really the time. If not now, come on, when?

As far as losing weight, I think everyone knows how to do it these days. It's not a magic secret. It's the very easy concept of eating clean and healthy, staying away from high calorie, processed foods and exercising. However, it's not that simple. I always say that it is a head game. Your head has to be in it and when it is, you'll lose weight with almost no effort. You'll just do what you need to do. When you're head's not in it - like mine isn't necessarily - it's a struggle.

I'll do good for a month or so, lose about 8 lbs and then stop. I'll get lazy, start eating poorly and then slowly gain it back. But I cannot do that this time. I have to lose AT LEAST another 10lbs, to be about 160 before the wedding. And if I am doing that, why not push it to 150? I can lose 20-25 lbs in 8 months, right? I lost about 70 lbs in that amount of time, so I can do. Need to do it, will do it, just do it.

How do you guys keep the motivation going?

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Diet Bet

Has anyone tried Diet Bet?
It is a website- - that allows you to bet on yourself and compete with others to lose weight and win money.

I'm thinking I should do this and have that extra push to lose weight.

Since my fiancé and I are getting married in about 9 months, there is a lot to save for right now and a lot of things we will have to be paying for in the near future. So... losing money is not an option. Maybe putting money on the bet that I will lose 4% of my weight will give me that extra push to make sure I don't slack off and that I really do lose the weight.

Right now I weigh about 172. So 4% of this would mean that I have to lose about 7lbs. This is doable for a month's goal.

I get kinda nervous/excited thinking about doing this. It would sure put the pressure on to lose weight tho! And then at the end of the month, I'd be 7lbs less and either get my money back or that plus some. Seems like a win-win.


Monday, August 26, 2013

Engaged! And losing again..

It's been so long since I've updated, which seems to be all I've written about for the last year. Sorry self and anyone who liked reading :(

But in happy news, I am engaged!! To the most awesome man :)

We're getting married the end of May 2014, so of course I am (back) on my mission to lose the final 20-30lbs I need to lose. I was on a roll there for awhile, and dropped about 70 in less than a year, and then for the last two years, I kind of just stayed around 170-180.

I can't even believe it's been more than 2 years since I was single, and just focusing all on myself and losing weight. And then I moved here to NC and things just kind of came together.

But there is nothing like a big white sleeveless dress to bring back the motivation to lose weight and look good! So I am back at it. I've been doing Weight Watchers (just on my own, writing down what I eat and counting points) and working out on the elliptical (so far, just 30 mins a day).

It's going slow, but it is going. And this time I really don't see myself stopping until I do lose the weight I want to because of the wedding. I shouldn't need a big event to do it, but man that's a good reason. Those pictures will last a lifetime, so I can't stop.

Thanks for the comments even tho I've been MIA and please leave me more. I hope to post more and to have this blog - and you guys - keep me accountable like it did when I was going strong.

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Fourth week itch? Feeling frustrated.

First couple weeks are always the best and the easiest. Once I started "being healthy" I lost 7lbs in the first 2 weeks and then these last 2 weeks, I've lost ONE pound. On Monday, I was 172.8, and now I'm, 173.3. So 8 lbs lost in a month, which is good, but I expected more than a lb in 2 weeks given the way I've been so on plan.

If I had been eating bad foods or overeating, then I'd be totally fine and understanding about it. But I have not been eating any snacks or anything "bad" at all. Pretty much every morning I have a smoothie (with just yogurt, banana, orange and ice), every day for lunch I have a salad (usually about 5 Weight Watchers points after dressing and whatever else), and then for dinner I have some sort of protein, lots of vegetables, sometimes rice, but never much. And then after dinner, I might have popcorn or a fudgsicle. This is a good meal plan!

I get soooo frustrated getting on the scale and seeing the same exact number day after day... all while I am straight up eating only healthy foods. And sometimes feeling bitter and deprived, haha. My boyfriend can eat anything and not gain weight, and eats snack cake things, peanut butter bar things, chips, ice cream, etc etc, and it takes effort not to join him. And what is all this effort and mindful eating getting me? Nothing. The last couple weeks anyway...

On Tuesday, we're going on vacation to California and I am looking forward to eating In N Out and whatever else I feel like eating. I won't jump off the deep end, but there will be no dieting while I'm there. And I hate to say that my motivation as of today is niet. Because right now it's not getting me anywhere. When I get back, I'll get back on the diet and start working out.

Friday, April 26, 2013

Hello again blogger friends & healthy life

Surprisingly, I have been getting comments lately (and for some reason, a ton of spam, idk why), but it has reminded me of this little space I used to write in so diligently. And then I got busy and stopped eating well and working out and have been going up and down between the same 5-10lbs for about a year and 1/2 now. Has it been that long?!

Well I am back on my healthy eating plan now. It seriously is a mental thing, like I always say, and for some reason, it just clicked in my head that I AM going to lose weight now. FOR Reals. I don't know why that motivation comes and goes, but it's here now, so I'm being strict and just trying to lose some much needed poundage.

We even had guests at our house this week, and my boyfriend's mom in town, so dinners every night - with wine, cookies, cake, cake, cake, pasta, potatoes, everything cooked in butter (not my doing), mexican food and more cake and wine. And I didn't make a big deal out of it or anything, but actually did ok eating more veggies and small portions of the fatty stuff. Even with the cake (do you ever feel like it'd be rude, and a huge deal if you turned down birthday cake?), I had a piece and only picked at it.

It also helps that I have told people, mostly just my boyfriend actually, that I am going to lose weight and eat healthy, so I don't want to do this again where I lose some weight, can barely see the difference, and then go back to the milkshakes. I feel like telling people makes me a little accountable because if I do say eff it and reunite with the Oreos, then I'll feel like I failed and everyone knows it.

Since I've said I was going to lose weight a few times in the last year and didn't, I kind of just want to prove that I still can and that I'm not just the type of forever complain about it. It's a stubborn thing.

Plus, we have some trips coming up that I don't want to be all self-conscious during. California, for one.. um yeah, beaches and bathing suits.