It hasn't been a good weekend food-wise. Maybe this whole weighing in on Friday thing isn't a good idea. I don't know if that is the reason for why I've been eating too much and too unhealthy, but I have been. I ate bad and snacked a lot this weekend. And the sad part of that is that I pretty much didn't do anything that would influence me to do that, like socializing or going out to dinner- nope, it was all me! Just making bad decisions and overeating. Last night I had vanilla ice cream and melted peanut butter to drizzle on top of it... yeah, I said it.
What am I doing? Why am I not caring about what I'm eating? Am I really just lacking motivation and the desire to do it?
Maybe it's emotional. I am very stressed these days. I am in a new town, and other than my family, I only know one person. I don't have a job and am desperately trying to find one. I need my own place and a new car. I also need a LIFE! And friends. Starting over is hard...
Am I sabotaging myself? I have sabotaged myself in the past, and I haven't really talked about it here, because I haven't found myself doing it, and I really hope that's not what I'm doing now, but it's in my mind. At least the awareness of it might prevent it from happening.
My whole goal here is to lose 100 lbs. I've lost 75 (give or take these days...) and only have 25 to go. 25 lbs is not that much to lose! I could do that in 3 months if I really tried. So why am I slowing down?
I have always had the notion that when you have less to lose, it takes longer to lose it and you have to work harder. Right now, if I put in the work, I still lose at a pretty good rate. But the whole problem lately has been that I have not been putting forth the effort. I take complete responsibility... now I just gotta change it and get my act together.